My husband and I are 40 years old. We are well seasoned travelers. Mostly to 5 star resorts around the world. We definitely are not "hotel snobs" .... but want to feel like we got what we paid for given the hotel's star status. We have been to Mexico approximately 20+ times in the last 10 years.

I wish I could say that the Valentin Maya was well worth the 5 stars that have been given on this website ... but that is not the case here.

They have some quirky, growing pains right now that need to be worked out. But given the prices that they are charging ..... I would have expected more.

Here's how it played out:

Booked thru American Express for 3 nights/4 days. Booked basic room with hopes of an upgrade. Got to the hotel. Very nice lobby as mentioned in previous reviews. Got the champagne (bad mexican sparkling wine) and fresh towel reception. Sat down at the desk and was checked in by an entirely clueless human being. I thought he was the bellman. Turns out not. We asked politely for the upgrade. Was told there were no upgrades. Fine.... can we pay for an upgrade? ..... was told "no upgrades .... go to the room and we might be able to accomodate you tomorrow... check back"..... okay .... this pissed me off..... The entire hotel looked deserted. But I was curious to see the room we booked.

So... off we go with the bellman on the golf cart to our hotel room. Well.... needless to say I was less than impressed. A very bare bones basic room with no pictures on the walls. One sink in the small bathroom. So.... I turn to the bellman ... hand him $20 bucks and tell him to take us to another room. So he drives us to the Golden Swim Up Suites .... puts in his master key and lets us in another room. We agree that this is where we want to stay. He immediately gets on the phone with the front desk and tells them that we are staying in this room. Pheeewwww! What a ridiculous ordeal that the bellman had to be in charge of finding us a room .....

We notice that we are in building 6. Pretty long haul to the restaurants but we have a nice pool in our back yard off the patio. And .... across the front yard .... thru building 5 .... there is the gigantic main pool.

All the pools have a salt water filtration system. Not quite as salty as the ocean .... but takes a day or so to get used to. Not my favorite .... and frankly I think they are adding too much salt.

The pools are NOT refreshing..... they are bath water warm. They need a better filtration system.

Drinks taste good down at the pool bar. Met alot of very polite, interesting people. My issue: I am a pretty good social drinker .... can definitely handle my liquor. I had 4 drinks ... no buzz .... so my husband orders a few shots all around for our new found pool buddies. Then more shots.... then more shots.... I probably, within a 4 hour time .... had at least 6 shots and 6 drinks ..... BARELY walked away with a slight buzz that you would get from drinking 2 glasses of wine!!!! I should have been falling over. (not necessarily my plan.... but was a bit shocked that I was not more inebriated) I am sure they are watering down the drinks at the pool bar. Other guests mentioned this as well. Don't get me wrong .... the drinks tasted wonderful..... were made to order. But, I felt like I was on vacation and wanted to loosen up a bit with some drinks. So.... I just started drinking the Dos Equis beer that they have on tap. This was good and cold. Did the trick.

Dinner was great as long as you order the right thing.

Il Olivo: The Italian Restaurant. - Do not order the Rib Eye Steak. I've had a better steak at the Waffle House. ughhh! Definitely order the lamb chops... worth every bite. Also the Risotto with peas, prosciutto and parmesan was TO DIE FOR!

Le Marche/ The French Restaurant - DO NOT order the Chateaubriand ..... again.... dog meat. Definitely order the Veal Chop..... so tender and juicy... melt in your mouth.

Japanese Restaurant - Here's where the restaurant experience goes bad. We were supposed to meet a couple here the first night but ended up going one hour late due to time screw up. So we walk into the restaurant and there is only a few couples sitting here and there eating sushi. There are some closed door Hibachi rooms. I don't see the other couple anywhere and ask the Maitre D' if we can look in the rooms to say hello to the other couple. He seems very put out and rolls his eyes ..... takes us to the first room .... we peak in and they aren't there.... We go to the next room and he opens it about 2 inches and we peak in and see them ..... I start to walk into the room and he puts his arm up and physically blocks me from walking in there!!! He says roughly... "you cannot go in there!!!" I said..."the hell I can't and brush past him"..... there were 8 people in there laughing and talking, our couple that we were supposed to meet were in there and waved us in. We walked in and said hello .... said sorry we were late .... that we would get dinner elsewhere and meet them later for drinks. The Maitre D' waited for us in the room and was standing over my shoulder rudely tapping me. I said my polite goodbyes to our friends .... and walked out of there!!! What a jerk! We went back 2 nights later to eat there for dinner .... and ate at the hibachi grill. (which was a fiasco to get the hibachi grill and had to bribe a waiter one day prior to put us on the list.) They refused to serve us any sushi at the hibachi table ..... finally I got them to serve us sushi .... but they said we would get what they brought us and that we could not order off the menu. Then they told us we had a pre fixe menu for the hibachi grill and would get what they brought us!!!! I was SOOOOOO pissed ..... my husband and I told the hotel manager that this was the WORST run restaurant in the entire hotel. The food was mediocre, the service sucked and the Maitre D' was a total jerk. Their policies were irrational and stupid.

Soooooo......

We usually never go back to the same hotel twice because we like to try new places ..... but ... I don't think for my money that I will stay there again.

If you want to try a TRUE 5 star .... go to the One and Only Palmilla resort in Los Cabos, OR go to The Cove Atlantis in Nassau Bahamas. OR Las Ventanas in Los Cabos or go to The Mirvaval Resort outside of Phoenix, AZ.

When the Secrets Excellence was owned by the excellence franchise .... that was a pretty wonderful hotel .... beautiful rooms, great food, good drinks, good atmosphere. But I understand they were taken over by another franchise. But .... I would spend my money there over this place any day of the week.

This place has a loooong way to go before they would even remotely be considered a 5 star. You will go and have a good time but just realize that this resort should be rated a 3.5 to 4 star at the absolute best EVEN when it gets the kinks worked out.